My counsellor, whom I’m going to name ‘Clipboard’ because of her constant use of the biggest one I’ve ever seen, is a nightmare. I’ve had three sessions now and I can definitively say, it ain’t working Clipboard.
About 30 minutes of our session was her having a go at me for not practicing the breathing exercises she taught me on our last session. She went on about the benefits of it and basically said, I can’t help you if you’re not going to help yourself. Bit harsh over some deep breathing!
Then I told her I was up all night last night, terrified that someone was breaking in. Firstly she reiterated the deep breathing stuff, then she went on to say, as opposed to lying in your bed scared, get up and check the house. (Admittedly I got used to Steve doing that when we were together). She told me if I felt uneasy I should just call the police. I said I didn’t want to call the emergency line over every little noise I heard. She told me that’s what they’re there for. They’re probably twiddling their thumbs waiting for a job, and if it’s just a cat or something they can let you know and you’ll feel better.
So on the basis of her advice, I’m to walk around my house deep breathing (god forbid I forget that) and call the cops if I hear a noise.
I realised at this point our relationship- it was doomed.
I’m feeling particularly vulnerable around this time and she did nothing to soothe that, she made reference to it being just like any other date, but that was it. I sat there wishing I’d stayed in bed and got a few extra hours.
The benefits office was a nightmare in itself. As usual I was made to feel like absolute scum. And then I was told I had the wrong medical certificate- this is the FOURTH time. But they take no accountability for the misinformation and the fact I have to pay to see my dr again for a revised form. So I’m off to the GP on Wednesday, right before my ‘singles course’ which will be stressful.
I’ll be glad when this week is over.