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So after the gruelling flight from the UK we were stranded for a while in Auckland because of a burst oil pipeline. By this stage we were all tired and grouchy and desperate to get to bed.

My Dad has continually ignored my advice (which he asked for!) in terms of flights, car rental and accommodation. So it was no surprise that picking up the car was a hassle, having to call them, get shuttled to a random warehouse and being presented with the smallest car in the universe!

Tempers frayed and we all ended up rowing on the way to the motel. Which is hideous!! I’ve never stayed anywhere so bad! But of course, I can’t complain about that as well! And I’m not paying so I need to keep my complaints to myself.

Yesterday I saw the kids, which was awesome, I’ve missed them so much. Steve was far more amiable then I thought he would be, so it looks like we’ll be able to come to a compromise. I don’t want to be too complacent, you never know what can change.

Today I’m seeing my community psychiatric nurse, as I can’t see an actual psychiatrist until mid October! Ridiculous. But at least I can get my meds sorted out. I’m taking my parents with me, I think it’s important they understand my illness properly. I can see they’re getting angry with me because of my anxiety and constant depression – but I’m doing my best.

I can’t see my lawyer until next week, so that will help finalise things with steve.

I have an appointment with the benefit office next week (first one available) so I can sort out my benefits as I currently have no income and rely solely on my parents.

I’ve even been in touch with my therapist and made an appointment to see her in a week so I can continue with that.

So I’ve been fairly pro active. The biggest thing now is to organise a house.

I feel a bit better about things, but again, I won’t be complacent! And I can feel things are tense between my parents and I. My dad won’t insure me on the car for some reason and it’s caused me so much stress because once again, I’m beholden to them. Plus, I can’t get the kids and we won’t all fit in the car.

Small things, I know I can’t let myself get wound up about it and hopefully seeing the CPN today which highlight the issues I have a bit better.

But yep, sure am happy to be with my babies again!!

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