Graphic sexual violence
Please proceed with caution
Deep in the night do you think of my eyes?
Can you see the fear? Can you hear the cries?
Can you remember your words? You were soft and clear,
You said I was ok, that I had nothing to fear.
Do you think about the force and ripping my clothes?
I know just how much detail that memory of yours goes.
It hurt so much I asked if you had stabbed me with a knife,
In a way I wish You had – than I wouldn’t have this life.
When you finished you said you were sorry for hurting me,
But you weren’t sorry, you were lying, because you didn’t leave me be.
You kissed me down there, made me dirty so I’ll never be the same,
You made filthy, made me guilty and I’ll always feel to blame.
You whispered you were sorry as you quickly left the room,
I lay there in the darkness, feeling dirty, feeling doom.
My body was no longer mine,
My underwear was torn,
I was terrified you would come back, or anyone would take your slack.
I lay on top the bed, searing pain between my legs, scared perhaps I might have bled all over the bed.
Terrified and sick, nothing really made sense anymore
I hoped it was all nightmare, but I knew my whole body was too sore.
The next day I could hardly walk a step, I had to tell my friend
She took me to a clinic, I was terrified i thought it would never end.
So many vile memories and tests for things I never knew before,
A pill to stop a baby,
Didn’t even think it possible,
My friend said yes, maybe.
I knew my life had changed
I was neither adult not child
Just disgraced little reject
Set to turn wild.
Broken on the inside
Brittle on the outside
Parts forever died.
One fateful night, you chose me
You did as you desired
You took away my choices
I was a girl you violated.
I know you don’t care at all
I’m just a piece of meat to you
A Virgin piece you got to break in two.
Helplines if you are affected in ANY way
US National Sexual Assault Hotline – 1.800.656.HOPE
Rape crisis UK 0808 802 9999
Rape crisis NZ 0800 88 33 00
Samaritans NZ 0800 726 666
Samaritans UK 08457 90 90 90
Crisis Line USA 18002738255